Dear GirlShrink,
I really need help with this boy. We have loved each other forever and he cheated on me before and we have a lot of history. We forgave and forget but my parents wont let him back into my life but they don’t realize how much he means to me. Please help.
Dear Friend,
There are lots of couples who stay in each others lives because of all the “history” that they share, but is that really reason enough for you to stay in your relationship? As far as your parents not understanding, this really all stems from the fact that your parents want to protect you AND they know that this guy has hurt you. It’s only normal for them to want to save you from someone who they feel isn’t too good for you. Ask your parents if it’s okay for your friend to earn back their trust (and yours!). Framed in that way, your parents may feel better about giving him a second chance.
Tagged as:
cheating relationships,
dating,
honesty
Dear GirlShrink,
About two months ago I met someone online on a sugar daddy website. It was the first time either of us has ever met up with anyone from the website. Lets call him Jack. Jack is 39 and very wealthy. His work causes him to travel a lot. He broke off his engagement of about a year off back in November. I am 19 and currently a student. Jack and I have only met up twice so far. Both times we went out to a very nice dinner and after we had sex. Jack is a gentlemen in all areas; during the intercourse he always pleases me first and if a position hurts he will change it to what he can tell I am comfortable with.
Though we met on a sugar daddy website. Jack and I have never made arrangements for pay or anything to make it seem like that type of arrangement. I guess it feels more like casual dating. I once asked Jack what we were doing and he replied “getting to know each other right now and seeing if we are compatible.” He texts me everyday since the first time we have talked. But sometimes he will answer right away, but a majority of the time he takes anywhere from an hour to 3 hours to reply to me. I know he is busy being away for work, but does this mean anything? I have come to develop feelings for Jack, but I am not quite sure what he is looking for and I find it awkward to ask because of how we met and also the age difference…
I was wondering if you could help me and give me some advice as to what he may want or be thinking. How should I act towards the situation? Also with the communication when we aren’t together with him taking hours to answer me. Should I not answer him right away? Do you think anything serious could ever come out of this? What is your opinion about the situation; any advice you could give me would be great.
KAY
Dear Sugar Daddy Seeker,
You need to remember why you sought companionship on this type of website in the first place and why he did too. Sugar daddy means he is looking for an “arrangement” that typically benefits him sexually and you financially. If anything more comes out of it — it’s a bonus. Do NOT look to this relationship as some sort of “real” relationship. At least not yet. As far as the texting, a 39 year old man hopefully has a job and probably some other familial responsibilities that you do not have yet and probably cannot respond to you right away. I would also venture to say that you probably text more than the average 39 year old. He’s not accustomed to using text as commonly as you do. Also — let’s be real here and say that there is always a chance that he is another relationship or that he’s even married. You just don’t know enough about him yet.
Personally, I think you guys have too much of an age difference and I would question why a 39 year old man would want to date a 19 year old. I would be cautious about this relationship and not put all my eggs into one basket. Continue to date others, especially in your age range, and take things as slowly as you can at this point.
Tagged as:
dating,
older man younger woman,
sugar daddy
